


Broken Streel

by adorablejoker



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Bat Family, Batfamily Feels, Bruce Wayne is Batman, Good Joker, Good Parent Alfred Pennyworth, Good!Joker, Healing, Hero!Joker, How Do I Tag, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Torture, Joker is good, M/M, Psychological Torture, Re-write, Self-Harm, joker needs a hug, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-03
Updated: 2019-08-15
Packaged: 2019-10-21 17:13:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17646605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adorablejoker/pseuds/adorablejoker
Summary: Broken, sick and screaming, Joker cries for help and Batman is the one to come to his aid. What happened to the crazed man for him to become so scared of his own shadow, where is his laughter? Where is his care-free ways? where is Harley? So many questions and one very hurt and confused Joker to try and bring them to light. Batman has his work cut out for him.





	1. Safe

**Author's Note:**

> This is the re-write from the old work I did a few years back, Enjoy!

"Help...." A broken voice echoed through the ally pitifully. A flushed man in drab, stained scrubs stumbled along, coughing as blood spilling from chapped lips and open wounds. He hissed in pain as something broken from within shifted as he moved. 

"Please..." he sobbed while glazed green eyes, dulled with torment, became half mast as contentiousness began to fail the green haired criminal.

Joker slid himself down a nearby wall, his body beginning to feel heavy and his head pounding. His ears were ringing and a constant shadow mocked and laughed at him from within his own mind. Joker choked as he forced himself to stand, pain ripping through his chest and knees as he limped his way further into the darkness.

Pain haunted those emerald eyes, a tearing torment that tortured the madman as he tripped and fell into garbage and piss. The scent of it left Joker gagging but he was too weak to move so he rested among the rats and howling felines. Blessed unconsciousness was a welcome thought, but would not come, and as Joker rolled himself on to his back to look up at the midnight sky he thought he saw a shadow pass.

"BATS!" He cried suddenly as he remembered that there was one in Gotham who would not kill him on sight. Joker rolled on to his hands and knees and forced himself to crawl, desperate to get the man's attention, but not knowing if he would be able to. He had one shot, and he prayed it would work.

 

 

A cat howled in pain near by, followed by a shriek. Batman didn't have time to investigate who was tormenting ally cats. When the feline gave another painful howl, he decided to take a look, he had a soft spot for cats after all.

Batman trailed the sound to a dark ally and as a tabby rushed passed him his eyes followed it's path and saw a crumpled man dressed in blood stained scrubs. The vigilante rushed over to check for a pulse and found himself face to face with the Joker.

"Christ!" Batman bounded back, readying himself for an attack. When Joker failed to get up, he became worried for the man and approached. He found that the Joker's breathing was labored and his cheeks were hollow and pale flesh had taking on a sickly gray hue. Batman reached forwards and pressed his hand against sweating forehead, the intensity of the fever sending warning bells through the man's head. Quickly scooping up the green haired criminal, Batman called for Alfred as he made his way to the city's canopy.

"Late night snack sir?" Alfred teased when he answered, 

"I need you to ready all emergency supplies, we are about to have an unwelcome guest but it's unavoidable," Batman spoke as he dropped down towards his car.

"What happened sir? And who is our unwelcome guest?" Alfred asked as he started to go through the medical supplies, without much of a reference on what was wrong he simply grabbed the entire kit and called for Barbra.

"Doesn't matter, just be ready for when I come home," Batman spoke and the com went dead.

"What's the emergency?" Barbra asked as she came down, watching Alfred pull out the medical bed and started going through all the emergency supplies. "Alfred?"

"I'm not sure, Master Bruce called and told me to get ready for an emergency, scurry on upstairs and grab a bowl of cold water and some cloths and start boiling some more."

"On it," Barbra headed up as Alfred put some clean white sheets on the medical bed and set up the IV drip just in case. He was quick to line up his surgical supplies and set the bowl of water and cloths aside when Batgirl came down with it and vanished to get the rest of the water that she left boiling on the stove.

Batman car came racing through the cave a moment later. He rushed out from the vehicle, his passenger draped in his arms like some lifeless doll.

"Mercy me!" Alfred rushed closer, realizing that it was the Joker his master had brought home, "What ever happened to him?"

"I don't know, but we don't have time," Bruce snapped as he placed Joker on the medical bed and the two of them rushed to save what was left.

 

 

Something was familiar. He could feel something soft under him and the cool dampness around him was a form of comfort. The smell was musty and a bit wet but there was something else, something terribly familiar but his muddled brain was having problems remembering what it was.

Something pinched him and it all came flying back like a nightmare long forgotten. 

 

 

Joker let out a wretched, blood curdling scream and his arms flailed as the needle meant for the IV was slapped away and the half delirious man found whatever reserve of energy he had and leaped from the bed, tearing off into the cave. 

"Damn!" Alfred cursed, "For a man who was unconscious he sure has some strength left."

"Batgirl, cut him off!" Batman called out as the red head rushed forwards to cut him off from the stairs. Joker panicked and stood frozen for a moment and Barbra got a good look at him. His eyes were in turmoil, emotions played along his face without restraint, pain, anger, fear and a crushing realization that he was trapped.

"What happened to you?" Batgirl whispered as Joker escaped in another direction. Batman took off in pursuit, they would need catch him or wear him down enough to sedate him. Barbra took to the upper levels as Alfred ran the long way around to cut the Joker off again. 

Panicked, Joker rushed around the cave. He didn't know where he was or who was chasing him. The world around him was blurry and the sounds seemed muffled. Voices were calling his name, teasing him, taunting him and sending dizzy spells through him but he didn't slow, he had to get away. He had to get away from the pain and the needles and the drugs and everything that hurt him.

Powerful arms grabbed him suddenly from behind and Joker screamed as he was roughly handled so to face his captor. All Joker could see was black and heard a thick, baritone voice that was familiar and without a face. A needle stabbed him from behind and he gave a choked yelp and grabbed at the shadow in front of him, tears falling from his eyes and coloring his cheeks

"I'm sorry, please, I'll be good," He choked, "Please, no more, no more, I swear I'll be good," Joker begged and felt those powerful arms catch him before all he saw was black.

 

 

"Have you ever seen Joker cry before?" Batgirl asked and watched as tears trailed down Joker's face.

"Have we ever seen him scared?" Batman asked as he carried him back to bed and set him down. Cloths were quickly removed and the Joker was bathed carefully by Bruce as Alfred went to grab something clean for him to wear. IV was inserted and blood was taken for testing and soon Joker was resting peacefully. 

"I'll do the tests, you head upstairs," Batman said, "Call Robin too, last thing we need is him coming down here and having a hissey fit."

"Yeah, that sounds like Robin," Batgirl rolled her eyes as she and Alfred headed up to the manor. Batman went to work, setting the blood sample in to the computer and listening to the laborious breathing of the Joker. The slight clicking sounds of the medical equipment was all that broke the silence and every once in a while Batman would wander over and check on the poor creature.

Once the computer was finished it gave a discouraging trill as the list of toxins appeared. From simple pain killers to drugs so powerful they were deemed to deadly to be used. There were anti-psychotics, uppers, downers, several different tranquilizers and some things that even Batman couldn't name. 

A soft groan called Batman towards the Joker. The green haired man woke, his eyes flickering open and panic filled them quickly as he reached up to tear the IV from his arm. Batman stopped him, holding him down gently as Joker twisted and struggled again him, delirious from fever and fear he cried out.

"Stop, please, I'll be good, I'll be good I promise!" He shrieked and Batman's blood ran cold,

"Joker! It's me!" He tried, "Open your eyes and looked at me!" Joker screamed again and Batman grabbed his face and forced him to look him in the eyes. Joker froze and and took in his face and cowl. Reaching up with shaken hands, he touched his jaw and neck. He brought both hands up to cup his face, his hands traveling along mask and cowl to wrap around pointed bat ears before he flung his arms around his neck with a joyful cry.

"You found me!" Joker cried, "You found me, you found me!" He continued on until words became sobs and Joker clutched on to the Batman's cape with an iron grip and cried.   
Batman froze as the other man clutched to him, crying until his throat was raw and eyes were swollen. Batman was not one usually to offer any kind of comfort, but Joker was not about to let go so he was forced to sit on the bed and endure the man's pitiful sobs and sniffles.

"Alright, hold on, you're getting tangled," the vigilante grumbled and pushed Joker off him as gently as he could to untangled the tubes and wires the clown was attached too, careful not to tug or pull too hard. He sat himself more comfortably on the bed and Joker latched himself on to his Bat once more. sighing, Batman leaned back against the pillows and ran his fingers through green curls, feeling the trembling calm under his gentle hand. 

"I'm not dreaming am I?" Joker asked, "Can't be, I hurt too much, can't feel pain in dreams."

"You're safe here," Batman spoke carefully as he felt light tugs and pulls on his cape as Joker fiddled nervously "What happened?"

"No," Joker said simply and shook his head wildly, "I'm not telling, I won't tell, you can't make me!" Joker voice started to raise and his hands reached to grab and pull at his curls. His eyes became wild and for a moment Batman feared that Joker would turn on him. 

"Alright, you don't need to tell me," He smoothed and ran his fingers through green tangles again, catching each of Joker's hands in his own and wrapped them around the other man, securing him.

"Batsy?" Joker rasped, his fingers fiddling with Batman's cape as he relaxed deeply in to the other's unintentional embrace, "Batsy, don't let them have me, alright?" 

Batman was at a loss for words, he had never known the Clown Prince to ever beg for anything. He looked down at Joker, his eerie green eyes were set downcast and tangled curls fell about hollow face, turning Joker in to something very doll like. Bruce blinked slowly, he had seen these kind of dolls before, porcelain ones dressed in harlequin cloths, white as ghosts with the downcast eyes and sadden faces. He used to think the little dolls beautiful, sad and lonely.

Was Joker beautiful? Yes there was a rather charming and unique look to the man, despite his terrifying smile and tacky cloths. His white skin and acid hued eyes had an almost mythical feel to them, a dark creature who would scare you to your grave and laugh about it with his head tossed back and bloody blade still in hand. Joker was a terribly beauty that you would never admit was beautiful in fear you would lose your sanity.

"Batsy?" Joker was looking up at him and Batman was shaken from his inner mind,

"Yes," He nodded.

Joker gave a soft sigh and drifted back to sleep and Batman looked down at the upturned face, relaxed in slumber and framed by green curls. Dark emerald lashes lay against gray toned flesh and deep red lips relaxed in to a light pout in sleep. 

Joker truly did look like a doll.

"I'll keep you safe."


	2. Silence

Batman worked in to the early morning hours while Joker slept. He noticed the harsh breathing and tiny breath hitches whenever the man tried to roll over, it spoke volumes when his eyes would flutter open with small gasps of pain when he managed to set himself on his chest instead of his back. 

"Possible broken ribs," Batman muttered and abandoned his work to assess the man. "Bruises are beginning to show. Malnutrition, dehydration and several drugs slowed the process. Possibly getting better."

"What do we do when he is better?" Alfred asked, stepping down the stairs with a platter of food for his master and a glass of water with some vitamins for their unexpected guest.

"I don't know, usually we would take him back to Arkham but with the state that he is in that is out of the question," Batman pushed his cowl off while running his hands through his hair. His eyes wandered back towards the computer screen where Joker's current list of medications still showed. 

"Best go get some rest Master Bruce, I'll keep an eye on our cave guest," Alfred gave a small smile and handed the platter off to him. Bruce seemed unimpressed with being ordered about but didn't challenge Alfred and left Joker in his care. 

The old butler turned his gaze towards the sickly man who lay sleeping, it would be a shame to wake him but bandages had to be changed and a full physical would be needed. "Buck up old boy."

"You know, the talking to yourself bit, that's my job,"

Alfred jumped near out of his skin when he heard the rough voice, whipping around to find Joker staring right at him. He swallowed hard and stepped up to the other to help him in to a seated position. "Boo!" Joker chuckled, a deadened tone from his usual high-pitched laughter. Coughing soon came, followed by a hiss of pain and Alfred felt a soft sting of pity for the man.

"Not funny," Alfred huffed and Joker made that awful humorless sound again. "Here, I got some vitamins for you, and aspirin for the pain."

Joker's gaze locked on to the innocent pills, eyes narrowing and his entire body seemed to tense. 

"I will not force you," Alfred spoke carefully, unsure as to what the other man could be thinking. Despite his nasty demeanor and lack of tact, Alfred was sure he could see fear race across Joker's face, a flickering of some unnamed nightmare that lingered in the back of his mind. The moment of silent waiting felt like hours until Joker reached out tentatively and took the medication.

Alfred gave a nod, dropped his hand and walked away.

"Not going to make sure I actually take them?" Joker drawled, his voice sending a chill down Alfred's spine.

"We are not a prison, or a hospital, take them or not, that's your choice chap," He offered a smile in hopes that he looked somewhat comforting, or at least trust worthy.

Joker was silent, carefully calculating the butler as he turned his back and started tidying up around the cave. He played with the medication for a moment, recognizing the pain killer and supplements. He sighed and shook his head, setting them aside and drank the water, he did not want to try to choke those down, not after what he went through. 

"Not use to so many wires," He muttered softly, fiddling at his oxygen hose, beginning to feel rather uncomfortable about the entire ordeal.

"Well then, let me free you of a couple of them and then take a proper look at you," Alfred offered. Joker's eyes locked in on him, narrowing to slits as his entire body went rigid. Alfred's hands came up in a passive gesture, not wanting to upset the man further. "Calm down, take a breath, easy there chap, we did manage to do most of our testing whiles you were asleep, but I just want to make you more comfortable, easier to breath and move with a set of broken ribs."

Joker could feel himself hyperventilating, he did not want any more medical attention, he didn't want the butler to come anywhere close to him. The moment Alfred spoke of testing he curled up into himself, knees pressed tight against his chest, tremors wracking his body. 

His eyes fluttered open when the soft scent of laundry detergent and a hint of lavender caught his curiosity. Looking down at himself he noticed he was wearing a set of blue flannels and a large white t-shirt. He felt strange for a moment, being in something that was so much larger than he, use to the scrubs and his form fitting suit. He nuzzled into his knees and took in the smell again, trying to distinguish the sensation and smiling when he found it. He felt clean, as if the filth of the streets were completely washed away from him and it was a strange comfort. 

"Alright," Joker whispered, his voice vulnerable and torn. 

"Let me remove some of these and then if you could remove your shirt?" Alfred spoke and carefully removed the oxygen and IV, keeping his touch professional while he handled the ailing man. 

Joker waited for the butler to free him from his wires before he hesitantly removed his shirt, hugging it to his chest for a moment more before lowering it in to his lap. 

Alfred winced when he saw the needle marks and bruising within Joker's inner arm, but that was to be expected, it was the rest of him that caused his reaction. Joker's shoulders were painfully bruised with bite marks, one scabbing over but still and angry red. There was a circular wound on his chest and scratches that marked around his hip and ribs. Matching bruising and lash marks littered his body from the shoulders down, making him look like some broken thing. 

Alfred was not sure what to make of the wounds but quickly began to set broken ribs, sooth aching flesh and clean open wounds. He did all this while mapping out every wound, every scar and ever flinch the Joker made as he bandaged, redressed and inserted a fresh IV. 

Joker took all the care without a word and it was then Alfred noticed the frown upon Joker's face. The crazed grin was gone, a permanent fixture on the clown's face since his accident froze the nerves in place. Joker looked up, his broken gaze looked right through him, focusing intensely with predatory precision. 

"You're Wayne's butler," Joker said suddenly, "So either you work for Wayne and get a few hours of work on the side, or you got careless."

"Master Wayne and the Batman have a contract," Alfred spoke as he passed the man some lip balm, "Someone needs to get him his fancy cars." Joker gave a snort as he smeared the balm on chapped lips. 

"Don't treat me like I'm an idiot," Joker whispered and leaned back against the pillows and sighed softly, glad for the comfort that the bandages were giving him. He could roll on his side with his back to the butler without feeling too much pain and with the oxygen replaced his breathing seemed much smoother. He could hear Alfred leaving and the quiet of the cave fell upon Joker like a thick fog.

That was when his mind began to play tricks on him. Shadows moved in the distance and laughter seemed to call from the depths. The bats fluttered their wings and Joker sat up, positive he saw something flash in the distance and as he started to relax again the voices in his head began to chatter. Joker growled and covered his ears, never before had the voices in his head been so annoying and nasty. They laughed at him, jeered and hissed, called him names and soon took on the tones of inmates and doctors. He covered his ears and curled in on himself, trying to silence them by sheer will alone. 

"Shut up, shut up," Joker hissed and shook his head as voices laughed at him, jeering and growling at him like rabid dogs. Joker wanted to scream but feared what may be laying in the shadows and so he suffered quietly as his mind continued to torment him. Tears began to well in his eyes, and he could barely recognize reality from the crazed noise going on in his head.

"Joker?"

Joker shrieked and sat up too quick, sending his head spinning and ribs screaming. Joker gasped and groaned, hugging himself as a pair of strong hands touched his chest and shoulder.

"It's just me," That thick baritone calmed Joker in a moment, knowing the voice by tone and sound for years and he didn't struggle when he was pressed against his pillows.

"Hey Bats," Joker muttered and jumped when he heard the wings of the real bats fluttering about above them, "Your accommodations could use some work."

"I'm working on it, a friend of mine..."

"Bruce Wayne," Joker drawled and looked Batman in the eyes, as if daring him to tell a lie.

"Yes, he said he'd keep you for the time being," Batman spoke and pressed his hand against feverish forehead. "You're still too warm."

Joker sighed softly and leaned in to the touch. Batman's hand was cool and relieved the head ache that was gathering behind his eyes. 

"We'er going to give you a sedative and then move you to Wayne's, you will be safe there, do you understand me?" Batman asked as Batgirl came around to insert the medication through the IV. A look of panic started to cross Joker's face and Batman had to stop him from yanking the IV right out of his arm.

"Don't leave me there alone Bats," Joker hissed and grabbed at Batman's cape, yanking him closer to him. "Don't leave me..."

The Sedative began to take effect and Joker fought a loosing battle as sleep took hold and he fell silent and relaxed against Batman's chest. The dark knight carefully slid his arms under the smaller man and lifted him, careful to not tangle himself in any of the tubes and cords he was attached to. 

"Why can't we just leave him down here anyways?" Robin snapped from the other end of the cave. His face was sour and his eyes were fixed on the lunatic in Batman's arms, "No more than he deserves."

"Because he'll get worse down here, that's why," Batman drawled as he passed the young man, fixing him with a glare as he went. 

Batgirl grabbed the IV and carefully brought it up while Robin was forced to bring the oxygen tank. The trio were able to get Joker set in one of the guest rooms where more medical equipment had been set up earlier that morning by Alfred. Batman set the poor soul in the bed and Batgirl pulled the blankets over him while Robin watched from the door.

"I'm going to stay with Wally for a couple days," He muttered as both Bats turned to look at him, "Give me a break, it's the Joker, okay, not fond of the guy!"

"No one is fond of him," Batgirl said "And you are just taking the coward's way out."

"Yeah, coward's way, all the way to Central City where I don't have to worry about a crazy clown right next to my room," Robin snapped. Batgirl glared at the young man's back as he headed out.

"You should probably head home," Batman spoke as he headed out of the room,

"And leave you here alone with the maniac?" Barbra asked as she removed her mask and shook her hair out. Barbra was adamant in staying but when Bruce Wayne gave her the bat glare the only thing she could do was listen, "Call if anything happens okay?"

"Don't worry so much, I can look after myself," Bruce said simply as Barbra headed for the cave to change. Bruce went to his room, peeling away his armor and tugging on something simple before collapsing on his bed. He would need to notify the League and he knew Dick's big mouth would notify his speedster friend, who would then tell everyone on the Young Justice team. "What did I get myself in to?"

Bruce rolled on to his stomach and sighed, maybe a couple hours sleep would do him some good, Joker would be out until sundown so he wouldn't need to make himself known until then.

"Just a nap," Bruce yawned and relaxed in to the comforts of his bed, the silence of the house and the taxing day made it easy for the millionaire to succumb to sleep.


	3. Screams

_He was laying on a cold hospital table, his arms and legs were strapped down and his head secured. He could hear the voices around him, but not make out the words. His breathing soon became panicked and he began to struggle, no, he couldn't be back here! He had escaped, he had gotten away! He heard the thick, wheezing voice of the new Doctor and screamed._

_"Now, now, don't be like that," He cooed and ran his hand over Joker's head, "Welcome back."_

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Joker sat up in bed with a silent scream in his throat and a sheen of sweat on his brow. He was panting and shaken, his eyes flicking from one dark corner to the next. Dark, it was too dark. He stood and scrambled to turn on every light in the room, closed all the curtains and opened every door and locked the only one that allowed entrance. He back himself in to a corner and curled up there. He could still hear the voice in his head, whispering the cold welcome, could almost feel the pinch of the needle.

He could feel the sensation of pins running up and down his arms, and he began to squirm in discomfort as he remembered the needles that had been jabbed in to his thighs. His began to scratch and dig in to abused flesh, as if he could tear the feeling away and make it stop. His nails became bloody as he started to rip away layers of skin, barely registering the pain. He couldn't make it stop though, not the prick of needles, or the voice whispering in his ears, he could even feel hands petting at his hair. Tears were welling in his eyes and a chilling wail was sent through his room and down the hall.

Rushed feet pounded against the floor outside and Joker jerked in to hyper awareness as he heard his doorknob jiggle.

"Go away, please go away," He breathed as he forced himself up and pressed in to the corner, "Go away, please, I'll be good, I promise."

The door burst open and Joker shrieked and shrunk himself as small as he could, trying to hide in plane sight as something loomed over him.

"Joker, Joker, it's me, you're okay," The thick baritone rushed over him like a tidal wave and he found himself looking up in to the Bat's eyes. A hand came up and ran through his hair and Joker shoved him back.

"No!" He howled and brought his arms up to shield his hair from further contact, "Don't touch me! Don't..." He coughed as sobs started to crack through.

"Okay, Okay," Batman stood up and headed over to the bed, quickly grabbing a blanket and then draping it carefully over Joker's shaken form, "You're safe."

Joker pulled the blanket close to himself, tucking his feet in and shaking from head to toe. Whatever nightmare that had scared him, it triggered a domino effect, now that his body was on the mend, his mind was going to go haywire. Batman didn't know what else he could do for the clown except sit himself in full view and wait. Joker trembled and he listened as Joker sobbed and tried to stay indifferent while the clown muttered and hissed at whatever voice he was hearing in his head.

"What are you doing here Bats?" Joker finally whispered and turned his gaze towards the vigilante.

"Checking in," Batman said simply and reached out attentively and pressed his hand against Joker's forehead. The villain gave a soft sigh and pressed himself in to the touch, his eyes closing as the coolness of the Batman swept through him and calmed his nerves. They sat there for a moment, completely oblivious to the other's thoughts, Joker taking in the simple gesture while Batman began to notice the emerald tinge to Joker's eyelashes and the soft pink that complimented his cheeks. "Your fever broke."

Joker gave a soft hum, disappointed when Batman pulled away and stood, "I'll send Alfred in to tend to you, don't wander off."

"Where would I go?"

Batman didn't answer as he vanished around the corner, leaving Joker to curl up in the corner with the blanket and no sense of safety.

"He didn't close the door," Joker whispered to himself as his eyes focused on the offending open door. He wasn't sure which voice was taunting him now, which voice began to whisper in his ear but he was quick to jump up and slam the door closed again and then rush back under his blanket. "No one is here, no one is here," He whispered "Shut up, shut up, shut up!"

A familiar taping on the door brought his attention back to the physical world.

"Alfred?" He peeped out hopefully, bringing himself into a tighter ball as the door opened and said butler stepped into the room. Joker felt himself go completely lax as the elderly fellow walked over and simply sat beside him.

"Are you hurt?" He asked first and Joker bit his lip and nodded, shrugging the blanket off and shyly showed Alfred his clawed-up arms. Alfred gave a soft coo before he stood and vanished away, making sure to close the door as he left. Joker found himself examining his arms himself, he had done a wonderful job in tearing himself up.

Alfred returned with a first aid kit and took a seat in front of Joker and held out his hand and Joker allowed the Englishman to clean and wrap his wounded arms, going so far as to clean the blood and skin from under his nails and wash his hands clean before he packed up.

"Would you care for anything else?" He asked and Joker shook his head, running his fingers through his ever-growing hair and giving Alfred a broken smile, "Alright, would you like me to keep the lights on?"

"Yes," Joker rasped and curled up in his blanket again,

"Would you like a pillow?" Alfred asked again and Joker nodded again. Alfred gave a small, pitiful sigh and stood up, walked over to the bed to retrieve both pillows and set them by Joker to use as he wished. "Try and get some sleep."

"Thank you," Joker hushed as Alfred left the room, closing the door and silently walking away. The room was silent all over again, with the voices calmed and the pain dulled Joker was able to lay himself down, back to the wall and facing the door. Sleep was evasive, but he was able to grab a couple hours between nightmares and shaken anxiety.

When morning broke and light filtered in through the room, Joker moved himself back to the bed and collapsed against soft sheets. A soft tapping on the door pulled a smile to his face.

"Alfred," He murmured as the butler stepped in.

"I see you made your way back to your bed," Alfred spoke, a tray with tea and a muffin in his hands, along with the pills that he was still trying to get him to take. "How about some breakfast and perhaps you can leave this room of yours hmm?"

Joker took the tea in hands, the warmth spreading from his finger tips down to his toes, the soft smell of something sweet tempting him to take a sip. The liquid was tangy on the tongue, the fresh taste of peppermint and honey lifted his spirits and the tartness of lemon woke him. He picked at the muffin, amused by the chocolate chips and made it his mission to eat every last one even if he couldn't stomach the rest.

He was unsteady, still, on his feet, leaving his medication behind and Alfred let the man clutch at his sleeve while they headed out of the room and in to the main house.

"Would you like to try the library, it is on the same floor and had a rather beautiful view of the estate," Alfred offered.

"Can anyone get in through the windows?" Joker asked. Alfred didn't blame the man for his paranoia, he was jumpy at best and tearing himself bloody at the worst. He lead Joker down the halls and in to the massive space. There was a reading corner set up just across from the door and the large windows were wide and let in the light and were sealed tight.

"Bullet proof glass, of course you were the reason they were replaced," Alfred quipped, hoping maybe a bit of harmless humor would get some kind of reaction out of the man.

Joker barley twitched when he remembered the attack, one of many, on the Wayne household. He had blasted a new entrance way two floors high and wide enough to fit his vehicle through.

"I remember, Harley was with me..." Joker's eyes widened as he thought of his blond sidekick. He had never been kind to her, forced himself on her and took so much from the poor woman. He felt the tears before he knew he was crying, watching with fascination as they dripped from his face on to the floor.

 

"What happened?" Alfred asked. Joker looked up, those dreadful eyes void and so very cold cut through his soul. Tears were freely running down the hollow face and his grip broke while he stood still, lost in his memory.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

_There were screams coming from the medical bay, high pitched and desperate. Joker was pressed against the glass of his cell, grinning wildly, not two days inside the prison and poor Harley was already get electroshock therapy._

__

_She screamed again and Joker was on his toes, how he was delighted by the sound, the feel of it rushing down his spine and making everything tickle. A giggle bubbled from his lips as he wiggled in delight. More sounds, more screams, it was music he could dance too._

__

_Then it all stopped. Confused and disappointed, Joker pouted and crossed his arms over his chest. He heard soft whispers crowd the cell block, an eerie silence coming over the asylum then, and other inmates were pressed against their cell doors._

__

_Another was a scream, but this wasn't Harley and the anguish that came off it made Joker's blood freeze. He recognized Ivy's voice and heard her yelling, crying out and banging against her cell door. There was a sound of the door hissing open and Ivy screamed, started to beg, usual sounds that would leave Joker panting and needy, wanting more._

__

_He was chilled to the core though, something wasn't right, this wasn't right. He watched as a cart was pushed by and his mind fell silent for the first time since he couldn't remember._

__

_Harley lay against white sheets, bloody hospital gown clinging to her chest. Her body twitched from the last of the shocks she had endured but by the blood coming from her ears and nose, dripping from her lips, they had pushed the limits._

__

_She was wheeled away, blond hair spilling over the sides, blood drops trailing, and all Joker could see were those beautiful blue eyes staring at him completely lifeless._

__

 

__

_"Pity, I had hoped she would have gotten better, oh well, perhaps you will be more...responsive."_

__

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Joker gasped as he came out of it, that thick, disgusting voice ringing in his ears.

"Joker!" He snapped his eyes up and saw Alfred reaching out to him, "Are you with me?

"Dead..." He started and would have laughed at the old man's confused look had he still found it funny, "Harley is dead."

"I'm so sorry," Alfred comforted, taking Joker by the arm and leading him to the secluded corner. Joker appreciated it, being left alone after these episodes. He felt a blanket get tossed over his shoulders and some pillows were dropped by his side. Alfred vanished for a moment before coming back with a couple of books.

Alice in Wonderland sat on top.

Joker picked it up and leaned back in his corner, he liked this book, the child like whimsy to it was good for his brain. He heard Alfred set the rest of the books near by, saying something about tea and lunch before he left. Joker was too lost in the land of wonder to respond, letting himself relax in to the pages and find peace in the library.

_"Alice,"_ Joker gasped and slammed the book closed, another voice whispering in to his ear and hands dancing along his ribs and hips, _"Such a pretty Alice."_

"Shut up!" Joker sobbed, taking the blanket and covering his head, pressing deeper in to his corner, in to the shadows, not wanting to be seen, not even Wonderland was safe anymore.


	4. Secrets

Joker became a frequent decoration in the library after the first visit. He would often collect the blankets, pillows and books, find a corner and make himself a fort and stay there all day. Alfred would bring meals (that were barely eaten), and the vitamins (that would go unused). There was a type of careful calm, everyone knew the Joker was inside, but he was so eerily quiet that they often forgot.

Joker didn't mind the solitude, there were soft taps from the butler on his little table to let him know he had food and he kept to himself, sometimes napping in his little fortress of fabrics and plush pillows. He shut out any and all stimuli and read through any and every book within reach to keep the voices out.

He could not remember the last time he had wanted silence, so use to the babbling and screaming inside his head that it never bothered him. New voices had invaded though, frightening ones, taunting ones, ones that had him question his own existence. He read because it gave him focus, and when he focused, the talking stopped.

_Alice_

"Shut up," Joker breathed, his eyes locked on the pages, but he was having a hard time seeing the words,

_Alice_

"Go away!" He hissed and started to scratch away at his scalp and face as if to tear the voices right out from his skull. He felt skin break and was conscious of the blood he was ripping from his wounds, but the voices continued to sing. He felt the scream rip from his throat but couldn't hear it over the laughter that taunted his mind.

"Joker!" The baritone voice he knew so well called to him. Cold hands against his cheeks and a cowl filled his vision. He felt his mouth move but the ringing in his head was overwhelming. Everything was too hot or too cold, the lights were bright and even the blankets that proved to be plush itched against his skin and he lashed out, panicked and confused.

"Joker, it's me, look at me!" He did, he really did and the smearing of blood in a grotesque smile across strong jaw made his mind short circuit and he laughed. He laughed until it hurt and continued to laugh until he broke down in to sobs, collapsing in to a cold embrace and clutching on to the man before him.

Batman wrapped the Joker up in his arms and cape, cutting him off from the stimuli around them. He wasn't sure if it helped but soon the clown was limp in his arms and sniffling pathetically against his shoulder.

"Can you stand?" He asked, and Joker nodded against his shoulder. Batman heaved the other on to his feet, careful not to jostle him too much, and carefully unraveled him from his cape and arms, "Are you with me?"

Joker looked up at him, deadened eyes and tear streaked cheeks made for a horrific image but he nodded. The vigilante was unsure but started to lead the mad man anyways. Joker reached out and took the other man's cape in hand, following meekly behind until they came to a bathroom. Batman pulled out a cloth and soaked it under some warm water, first wiping down his own face and then turning his attentions to the barely-there criminal.

Joker's face was riddled in scratches and his scalp was a mess of tangled hair and missing patches, but he managed to wipe off most of the blood and get a comb through the mass of curls. He paused when he notices carefully shaved away patches and what looked to be incisions on the man's temples and back of the head. He ran his fingers over one and Joker jolted in to sudden cognition and pulled away.

"What happened?" Batman asked, blunt as always but his voice held an undertone of worry.

"He..." Joker hesitated and touched the wound at the back of his head, sending a shudder through his body, "He...Umm..."

"Slowly," Batman encouraged "He...?"

"He thought...he believed," Joker tried and looked up at the masked man and took a deep breath and let it out in a mangle of words, "He drilled in to my head..."

Batman stood in shock as Joker hyperventilated in front of him, leaning roughly against the wall and yanking at his hair again.

"He...He though he could shock me back in to sanity, so he inserted these...probes in to my head and flipped the switch..." Joker trembled, "It hurt...so much more than it usually does."

"Deep breaths," Batman soothed, untangling Joker's hands from his hair and petting it down in a gentle manner, not use to being so kind but knowing it would help keep Joker grounded, "What else can you tell me, who is he?"

"He...was the Doctor running the place...new...accent, I don't..." Joker closed his eyes tight and tried to wish it all away. He could almost smell him again, the stink of cigars and the rasping sound of a voice over used and abused by cigarettes.

_Alice_

"Shut up!" Joker howled and banged the back of his head against the wall in a desperate attempt to silence the sudden laughter, not his own, in his head. "I'm not Alice!"

"Woah, okay, let's not do that," Batman spoke and forced Joker away from the wall and sat him down on the toilet, "Who's calling you Alice?"

Joker shook his head violently and tore at his hair, trying to rip away the feeling of hands tangling in to it and curled around slim, bony fingers. He could almost feel the tickle of breath against his ear and the smell of burnt tea and something rotten and sweet. He curled his knees to his chest and screamed, clutching at his ears as that horrible voice continued to call him a name that wasn't his.

He was suddenly lifted and moving, the cape surrounding him again and cutting off the light from the halls. He mapped out where they were headed in his head, his breathing coming out in rasped pants when he lost his way and panic started to seep in to his system. A door opened, Joker flinched, but he was dropped on to a soft bed and a heavy blanket was dropped on to him. 

Lights were turned off and the door was shut, and the only sound in the room was his breathing and Batman's. He felt a calm fall over him, the weight of the comforter on top of him, the lack of light and sound let him focus only on the breathing of the Batman and his rapid beating heart.

"Bats?" Joker peeped and peeked out from under his covers, slowly sitting up and looking around the dark room. Something cracked, and Joker jumped at the sound. Batman stood off in a corner, a glow stick in hand illuminating his face and outline.

"Better?" He asked, Joker nodded, "think you can tell me what happened?"

"Bad memory," Joker explained, "I couldn't stop it."

"Triggered a panic attack, not surprising considering the circumstances, you might suffer from them for a while. Cutting off as much stimuli as possible helps calm down attacks in some people," Batman explained as he looked about the darkened room.

"Thanks," Joker mumbled and brought the blanket closer to himself, "It was Hatter."

"Say again?"

"Hatter called me Alice, I look nothing like a blond little girl, but he was determined that I was his Alice, he would stalk me in the prison, pet me and touch me, seek me out in the showers and tell me how pretty I was," Joker curled in tighter to his blankets. "I beat the living daylights out of him more than once, but he was a persistent little creep and kept coming back, kept saying that he'd save me from the Queen and we'd leave Wonderland together. I thought I was losing my mind, his took a one-way trip out the nearest window and killed itself."

"Why would he compare you to Alice? It had to be more than just looks in his mind, like you said, you're not blond, or a girl," Batman hummed, "He didn't try anything else, did he?"

"Besides molest me in the showers? No," Joker hummed, curling tighter around himself, "He tried though."

Batman recoiled at the thought, he couldn't see Joker's face from where he sat with his glow stick, but his hair was illuminated, and he could make out his posture. Joker was more than just a victim of whatever sick torture he had gone through at the prison, but he had been a target of Hatter's fantasies and whatever sick game he had been playing.

"His mental state deteriorated so he was living in his fantasies, escaping in his mind, he probably thought the entire prison was his Wonderland and everyone there was a character," Joker continued "How I became Alice? I don't know, but he was the Doctor's second favorite test subject."

"Who was his first?" Batman asked before his brain caught up with his mouth,

"Who do you think?" Joker drawled, sitting up and glaring down his nose at the caped crusader. They watched one another for a long time, staring, daring the other to blink without words and as the silence stretched and the moment weighed down, Batman regretted what he had asked. He couldn't see Joker's expression in the darkness, but with the glow light he could make out the porcelain skin, sunk in eyes and green hair. The look was nightmare fuel without the added weight of his words echoing in his brain.

"I should head out, I'll send Alfred in if you still need company," Batman stood and tossed the glow stick on Joker's bed, "Try and get some sleep."

"Don't be out too late," Joker breathed, "We wouldn't want you to end up in my place,"

Batman turned with a retort, but it died on his lips as the glow stick that once showed very little lit up Joker's entire face. A madman illuminated by green light, blazing toxic green eyes sunken in to blackened flesh were significantly more terrorizing when sparks of sanity shown a warning.

"What are you saying?" Batman asked, watching that demonic grin spread over Joker's face as he chuckled humorlessly,

"I'm saying, Bats, is that the good Doctor has a hit list, and you are sitting right on top of it."

Batman was baffled as he stood at the doorway of that room. Joker tilted his head and stared unblinkingly at him, waiting for his reaction to this little bit of information.

"Who else is he after?" Batman asked, worry beginning to bloom for Barbra and Dick, if this man was after him, there was very little stretch of the imagination on who else he would be after.

"Everyone," Joker whispered, "Criminal and Hero alike, and Bats, He knows things, he told me things about myself I couldn't even remember."

"What did he tell you?" Batman asked, watching as Joker played with the glow-stick. There was a moment when Joker brought it close to his face and Batman could swear he saw those vivid eyes were glowing. He turned that glowing gaze towards him and then seemed to lose himself in to the distance.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

_"Tell me what you remember?" That sickening voice was louder than ever, ripping through his skull and piercing his ears. Joker struggled against his restraints, the belts around wrists and ankles tight enough to leave marks. "What's your name?"_

_"You need to get your eyes checked, Doc," Joker hissed, this was only his second visit with the good doctor and he would be damned if he let himself be broken this quickly. A sudden jolt of pain ripped through his body and he screamed as the electroshock blasted through his head right to his toes._

_"Let me try that again, Name?" He asked_

_"Read my file, I'm sure it's there, top left-hand corner, corre-ah!" Joker choked as another shock ripped through his body,_

_"Name?"_

_"Joker," He screamed, this was becoming less about his name and more about him screaming at this point._

_"Your Name?" His voice was so damn calm._

_Joker lay there panting, sure that the machine was turned up from its usual level of shock. He cried out, his silence rewarded with another blast of electricity._

_"Name?"_

_"I don't remember," Joker admitted, feeling the tears dripping down his face, unaware of them until now, "I don't know, I don't know..." He continued to chant the words until a scream ripped through him, another blast of 'therapy' for not knowing a basic part of himself._

_"Let me teach it to you then, yes?" The Doctor spoke, a grin spreading over his face, "Repeat after me, My name is Jack."_

_"Jack?" Joker breathed and howled as he was punished for his disobedience, "My name is Jack!"_

_"Good, one more time, now,"_

_"My name is Jack; my name is Jack..." The words became a mantra, at that point he would say anything just to be let loose. He continued to choke out the words until he answered to the name, and at some point he was released from his torture and allowed back to his cell, a new name written on his scrubs._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Jack Napier," Joker said smoothly, "I remembered it after a few days, but it's still strange to me."

Batman stood, shocked. He had known the name existed somewhere, but he had thought it was lost when Joker came out from that vat.

"He's dangerous, Bats, and you have a very pretty target painted on you..." Joker turned back to him, his eyes meeting Batman's in the dark, "Be careful."


	5. Solace

A knock on the door brought Joker to the waking world. He felt the weight of last night's yelling and thrashing, and his ribs hurt something fierce. He pulled the blankets over his head in a childish display of mutiny and tried to go back to sleep.

The door opened and a hand on his shoulder roused him from his half-awake state.

"The Batman was quite worried about you," Alfred spoke through layers of fabric, "So I thought I would come and peek at your wounds, if you would allow."

Joker shuffled from under the covers and sat up in bed, letting the butler check his face, arms and head for any open wounds that may have been left untreated. He was quick to check Joker's ribs and re-wrap them before he demanded the man to stay in bed and rest.

"I'll be happy to fetch a collection of books for you, if you so need, but you are to stay here for the the time being," Alfred explained, tucking Joker back in to bed. He headed out the door only to return with a trolley laden with food, drinks and the ever-present vitamins.

"Who else are you feeding in here, Moby Dick?" Joker giggled as a tray was set on his bed and a plate, glass, mug and cup of pills were set down.

"I thought you would be ready for something other than oatmeal and tea, so I brought up everything but the kitchen sink to appease you," Alfred grinned, chuckling as Joker's smile widened in glee, "I have Eggs, Bacon, waffles, Apple Juice, Tea, Cocoa, cornflakes and fresh fruit. What will it be?"

Joker's mouth watered as the smell of everything his hit nose. His stomach growled with anticipation as he picked out his breakfast. Waffles with a helping of strawberries, covered in syrup, with a mug of cocoa and a side of melon salad. He attacked his breakfast with delight and wiggled around in his bed as he licked his fork and spoon free of syrup and strawberries. Alfred was reminded of a younger Bruce, so easily excited by sweets and treats.

Joker finished off with his Cocoa and held his glass out for apple juice. 

There was a moment where he stared at the pills on his tray, unsure and unsteady. With his mind made up, he scooped up the vitamins and tossed them back with a swallow of juice. He forced himself not to gag or spit them back up, finishing his juice in a few more gulps and setting the glass down.

"Pills don't do well with you?" Alfred asked, cleaning up the tray and wheeling the trolley aside.

"After having them jammed down your throat you tend get a distaste for them," Joker explained "They didn't do much as check to see if you took your medication as they did force you to."

"Their treatment of you was terrible, criminal or not, you deserve some form of humane courtesy," Alfred huffed and cleaned up, "Master Bruce would like to see you down for dinner tonight, if you so choose."

"Oh, the Master of the house finally allowing himself to meet his guest?" Joker chuckled, "What will I wear?"

Alfred smiled, amused by the Joker's playfulness, "I'm sure we can come up with something, so, anything tickle your fancy, or should I just bring any books up that include fairy tails and whimsy?"

"Something a little less whimsy and a little more Stephen King," Joker grinned. Alfred didn't ask about the sudden change of novel choice but took note, cleaned up and headed out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hours later Joker was nose deep in to The Mist, his blankets and sheets were artfully tied on the bed posts, pillows and comforter built up as a wall with Joker tucked away inside his makeshift fort. He was laying on his stomach, feet bent up and swinging, souls running along his fabric ceiling with his chest and arms propped up with even more pillows. Joker could make an entire hideout of pillows with the amount he found stashed away in the closet and linen room across the hall.

He was happily oblivious to the world, only coming too when Alfred came in with lunch, a light salad with toast, honey and a sweet tea, only to go back in to the world of Stephen King.

He fell asleep his with book dropping to the floor sometime after he had eaten and woke to a light shake on his shoulder. Alfred stood over him with some cloths in hand, a brush and some shoes.

"Dinner will be soon, so I would assume you would want to be ready for it," He explained, watching Joker climb out from his little sanctuary. Stretching, Joker took the offered clothing and headed for the bathroom to clean up. Once inside with the door firmly locked, Joker was able to wipe himself down with a damp cloth, not bothering with a full shower, so as not to disturb his bandages. He pulled on the simple black pants that hung low on his hips and was surprised to find them flattering to his lanky figure. Sitting, he pulled on the socks and shoes, slightly disappointed about the loose fit, but let it go, he would be sitting for most of dinner anyways. When it came to his hair though, he was at a loss.

"It got so long," Joker breathed as he looked in to the mirror. Bruising and sores were healing at last, his body was filling out but still needed much more work. His face looked less hollow, but his hair fell in ringlets down to his shoulders and around his face.

Brush in hand, Joker combed the green mass in to manageable mane of thick waves and pulled it all back in to a tail at the nap of his neck. Satisfied, he tossed on the plum shade sweater and took a final look at himself in the mirror. He wasn't quite swimming in fabric, but the sweater did hide his malnourished form and highlighted what little color he had blooming in his cheeks.

Joker left the bathroom, not surprised to see Alfred waiting, and allowed the old man to lead him down to the smaller dining area.

"Master Bruce enjoys his dinner in the kitchen on most occasions," Alfred explained, "But he insisted that we set up the dining room for tonight."

"Well, don't I feel special," Joker giggled, watching Alfred open the double doors to the dining area and gave a whistle when he stepped inside, "Don't try too hard, Brucey."

"At what?" An amused voice sounded from across the hall. Joker's eyes landed on the figure already seated at the head of the table. Perfectly cut suit draped seamlessly over broad figure as Bruce Wayne relaxed in to his seat. Joker could appreciate the man's smile as he sipped his tea, baby blues trained on Joker's own acid green.

"Impressing me," Joker purred, unable to help the sharpness of his tone as a smile crept on to his face, "I'm not so easily played, like your lady friends."

"I don't need to impress a man who's renovated my home more times than I can count," Bruce drawled, motioning for Joker to take a seat at his left, "And broken in just as many."

Joker tossed his head back with a laugh, deep and true in sound, before he sauntered over to the offered chair and sat down with cat like ease. Bruce hummed, taking another sip of tea as Alfred appeared to Joker's left and set down another mug before he vanished out another door.

"You trust me alone with you, how sweet," Joker cooed, pulling the honey close and giving his tea a generous helping. Bruce chuckled, sending a delightful shiver down Joker's spine.

"You have broken ribs, barely enough coordination to walk, let alone fight and your muscle tone has dropped to nothing, pretty sure I can take you," Bruce spoke, keeping an eye on the clown and every bit of sliver wear in close proximity. There was a pause in the smaller man's movements as he took this information in. Bruce was right, of course, Joker spent more time leaning against walls for support than not. He had just seen himself in the mirror and as Bruce said, he has very little meat on his bone, let alone muscle tone.

A small child could take Joker down, Bruce would wreck him.

"Alright, point," Joker hummed, taking a sip of his sweetened tea, enjoying the warmth it brought with it. He could feel Bruce's eyes on him, but he refused to squirm under the scrutiny. The silence wasn't uncomfortable but there was a charge in the air that, if left unchecked, might send both men in to frenzy.

"Care to tell me about it?" Bruce asked, breaking the thickness in the room and leaning forwards on t his elbows. Joker tilted his head from side to side, feeling his hair brush along his shoulders and neck. He could taste the bitter sweet justice that Bruce felt, could pin point it in his face.

"You think I deserved it, don't you?" Joker drawled, startling Bruce out of his relaxed pose, "You think I called for it."

"From what I understand, you were tortured," Bruce spoke, "No one deserves torture."

"I've tortured people," Joker admitted, "I tortured Harley, women, taunted children and watched the world burn around their ears, and you are going to tell me, that you don't think I deserved what I got?"

"You deserved many thing, Joker, but torture was not one of them," Bruce stated firmly. Despite the terrible things Joker had done, the lives he had taken, the torment he has wrapped around the city he haunted, he did not deserve torture.

Silence fell again, and Joker sipped his tea. He wasn't so sure that Bruce was being honest with him, hell he wasn't being honest with himself most days. He could recall perfectly what had happened in that void of a prison, the people who had taken their anger and frustration out on him, taunted and toyed with him until he realized that perhaps they spoke the truth. Maybe he did deserve the pain and humiliation, maybe karma was real, and he was getting back what was given to him.

Alfred came back with soup and salad but Joker found his appetite lacking.

"I don't know what happened to you in that prison, but I can assure you that we won't be sending you back," Bruce soothed, carefully smiling at the man who once treasured laughter. Joker felt a little less defeated with that small comfort and started to eat. Their meal went with very little conversation, but at least it was pleasant. Joker had no issues with playing with his food when he could, making small faces in his mash with his peas and carrots. Bruce would have scolded the man for his childishness, but Joker was behaving the best Joker could without throwing sharp objects at him so he let it be.

Once dessert came around, Joker was making a snow man out of was what left of his mashed potatoes and would have complained about having his plate taken away if it wasn't replaced by a bowl of ice cream. Joker wiggled in his seat, delighted by the frozen treat and happily dug in without playing with it first.

"What, no ice cream for you?" Joker asked when he noticed that Bruce was munching on some ginger cookies with milk.

"Not a fan, actually," Bruce admitted, and Joker seemed to take that as a personal insult.

"How could you not like ice cream!?" Joker gasped, scooping up a spoonful and jamming it in his mouth like it would make Bruce see his point.

"Not much for sweets in general, to be fair," Bruce chuckled and waved his cookie, "These will do just fine."

"Never, ice cream trumps cookies any day," Joker insisted and spooned another helping in to his mouth almost giving himself brain freeze with how quickly he was downing his bowl. Bruce shrugged, he wasn't about to fight with the man about dessert choices, so long as he kept his in his bowl and not all over the table and floor. Honestly, you would think he was a toddler with how excitable he was.

With dessert cleared away and another cup of tea in hand, Bruce offered to take Joker back to the library, maybe for a game of chess or some reading.

"I'd love to, but all this excitement has caught up with me," Joker waved off, "I think I'll head back to my room and sleep it off, thanks for dinner Brucey, it was delicious."

"I'll let Alfred know," Bruce winked, ginning from ear to ear. Joker laughed, a soft, warmer tone than before, happier and care-free.

"Hey, Wayne, thank you, for this...taking me in and all, anyone else would have let me die out there," Joker drawled. He knew he was lucky, he knew any other man would have put a knife to his chest and put him out of everyone's misery, but not Batman, and apparently not Bruce Wayne.

"You're welcome," Bruce nodded, that lazy smile slipping back in to place, "See you in the morning."

"See you," Joker hummed and started back towards his room, maybe he could get use to this.


	6. Spared

Joker was braving the sitting room with a book in hand, mug of hot chocolate and a bowl of strawberries to keep him entertained. The television was on to produce some background noise while Joker skimmed the pages of IT.

Heavy foot falls caught his attention and he looked up to see Bruce stepping in through the hall. Joker was partially grateful for the warning, but also annoyed that he needed it. Lately he had been keeping his back to walls and out of clear view of windows. He kept his head down and scurried from place to place, a silent, pale ghost in this large mansion. Alfred had come in to his room and informed him that it was Saturday and that Bruce would be in all day should he want to see or avoid him. Joker hadn't paid any attention until the mention of the date and then demanded that he be lead to a TV, so he could watch his cartoons.

An amused Alfred had brought Joker to the smaller sitting area, usually reserved for Richard and his guests, but since Master Greyson was away with friends for the time being, it was free for Joker's use. Alfred had come in with the offered meal and several books soon after.

"Alfred said you had wandered further in to the house," Bruce grinned, falling in to an arm chair, crossing his legs elegantly. "Loony Toons?"

"Nothing beats Bugs Bunny and Tweety," Joker huffed, popping a strawberry in to his mouth and tossing his pony over his shoulder. Bruce chuckled, causing a tremor to zip up Joker's spine and tickle its way back down. Bruce had an addicting laugh, deep and thick like chocolate, maybe the sound of black velvet or silk. Either way, Joker adored it and was contemplating tickling Bruce to get more of that sound when the TV gave off a high-pitched siren with the words 'Breaking News' scrawled across.

"Hey!" Joker pouted as Tweety Bird vanished and a pretty blond woman replaced him. "My cartoons!"

"Okay, let's not hurt the TV," Bruce reasoned, standing up to pull the remote from Joker's hand before it became a projectile.

"Breaking news, Joker's escape!" The woman spoke and both men paused, switching all focus to the television, "Earlier this week we have had reports of Joker's latest escape from Arkham Hospital for the Criminally Insane..."

"Hospital, my ass," Joker hissed, picked up his mug to throw only to have that swiped out of his grip too.

"Joker, now known as Jack Napier, had been under the attentive care of the new doctors at Arkham Hospital, formally known as Arkham Prison, for his mental insanity and dilutions. During this treatment, Joker had been showing signs of wellness and improved clarity, only to escape days ago from the Hospital. Doctor Harish is on location for comment, Doctor?"

A large man filled half of the screen and Bruce heard Joker whimper before he backed up right in to Bruce's body and froze, trembling. This man had thinning black hair and beady eyes sunken in to a flabby, pinched looking face. Harish smiled, showing rows of yellowing teeth and his breath came out in wheezing pants.

"Thank you, dear, yes, Jack was a special case undergoing intensive treatment. Because of his dilutional obsessions and identity dysfunctions we wanted to be able to help him recall and remember himself before further controlling his personality disorders and enabling him to live more comfortably within the safety of our hospital," Harish spoke, his thick accent choking on some words. Bruce noticed the way the man drooled, forcing him to lick at his lips and chin, "We were able to break through to him but before we could further bring in his control, he was found missing from his rooms. We suspect he escaped during one of the many recess hours and crawled away through either our ventilation system or through the laundry chutes."

"Is the Joker still a danger to the public?" The reporter asked,

"He is more of a danger to himself, we wish to bring him back unharmed so that treatment can continue, if spotted he is not be approached and to call our medical team immediately, he is sorely missed among his new friends..."

Joker had turned in to Bruce, clutching his shirt and shaking. Bruce flipped off the broadcast and grabbed the blanket that Joker had brought down with him, throwing it over the man's form and head to shield him.

The smaller man was shaking from head to toe, his hands bunched close to his face as he stepped as much in to Bruce as the solid body would allow.

"That's the man who did this to you?" Bruce asked. Joker didn't respond right away, he was trying to remember how to breath. The scent of the man he was pressed against was expensive, from the soft cotton of his shirt to the smell of musky cologne, but under it all was that clean smell of lavender from the laundry soap. Joker clung to that, nuzzling his nose in to Bruce's chest and breathing it in.

A hand settled on his head and another was rubbing slow circles on his back, trying to sooth away his fears and anxiety. Joker settled and finally nodded to Bruce's question.

"Harish, he rules the Prison," Joker rasped, "We all learned his tricks, we learned his rules, we learned, or we died. The Prison got worse because inmates got worse. Hatter was tame, the others...others..."

"Don't rush yourself," Bruce murmured, sliding the blanket off Joker's head and draping it gently around the criminal's shoulders, "I'm not the one who needs to know this stuff anyways."

Joker stared at Bruce as if he had just said something incredibly stupid. Unblinking, Joker turned and sat back down on the couch, found his book and curled up again. There was a tense moment where Bruce had no idea what to make of what happened, had he said something wrong? Joker turned his gaze back to him with a twitch of a smile and Bruce understood.

Joker would wait for Batman, so there was no need for him to hang around anymore. Bruce huffed out a chuckle and shoved his hands in to his pockets, he was being dismissed in his own home, but he wouldn't complain, not this time. There was a sound of the remote clicking and the music of Bugs Bunny came back in full. Joker would be fine until nightfall, and then Batman would get whatever information that the clown was willing to give.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Joker slept restlessly in the sitting area. He wasn't sure when he had fallen asleep or even how he managed it without exhausting himself first. His arms were tangling around a pillow and his covers were twisted around his legs and torso, but somehow the criminal slept on.

A sound of heavy fabric startled him awake, however, and he found himself struggling with himself as he sat up, lost and confused in the large sitting area.

"Bruce said you had information," Batman's voice floated over from the bookshelves, "He also says your panic attacks are becoming more frequent."

"Harish is a mean son of a bitch, and you should keep as far away from him as you can," Joker snapped, finally freeing his legs from his blankets and kicking them off the couch. Batman watched this, bemused, before he slid himself off the bookshelves and moved to stand near the window.

"I saw the news; how did you escape?" Batman asked. Joker stood and joined him, keeping just out of sight from the window, hidden from the outside world.

"Played dead," Joker drawled softly, "Or maybe I had died and come back, I can't remember, all I recall are sounds."

"What did you hear?" Batman asked slowly, the play of emotion on Joker's face was incredible, one to the next without restraint or settling on any one of them for too long.

"I was being wheeled down the halls, like Harley had been, like others had been..."

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_The wheels were loud and squeaked painfully in to his ears, but he couldn't move his hands up to cover them. Rough cotton was over his face, and for whatever reason Joker found himself holding his breath. There was heavy foot falls and a wheezed breath before a bang of opening doors and a sickening scent of death and fire._

_Joker's eyes snapped open and he held his breath, swallowing the dryness from his throat away in a silent gulp. Those heavy steps walked away from him and the doors crashed open again and Joker waited until everything fell silent._

_Sitting up, he found himself in the crematorium, cloths and costumes were scattered without care, ash covered the floor and the smell of it forced Joker to cover his mouth or cough loud enough to alert someone that he was alive._

_He was alive._

_He didn't know how or why, but he was breathing. He hurt, and everything felt like it was burning but his brain went to survival mode. All the voices in his head shouted over every other one 'get out, get up and run, you fool, go!'_

_And he did, oh he did, he found the nearest vent and he dashed for it, crawling up the wall like an animal trapped in a cage for far too long and he squeezed himself through. He crawled and squirmed and thanked the doctors for starving him so he could fit through the tiny space and in the end he pushed out in to wide open space and breathed fresh air for the first time in months._

_He ran from there, picking up speed and crashing in to the gates, again thankful for being starved and skeletal, being able to squeeze through the bars and dash away. He ran until he reached the city and, ran still until he found himself laying in piss ad garbage, pulling on a cat's tail to get the attention of one Dark Knight. ___

__

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

__"I must have flat lined on the table," Joker drawled, leaning against the wall and playing with the fabric of the curtain. "He probably came back to burn my body and found it gone."_ _

__Batman wasn't sure what to make of the laugh that came next, bursting forth from Joker's chest in a bitter spill of giggles and choked chuckles. He became silent after his fit, wheezing on his own breath and smiling to himself as he lowered his body to the floor. His legs stretched themselves out in front of him, his smile was almost sickening as he stared at his lap, his light pajamas making him look ghoulish as he simply sat and smiled, unable to move with his thoughts running wild._ _

__"Maybe it was mean to be," Batman hushed, snapping Joker out of his deadened state "maybe you were meant to live, to escape."_ _

__"Why?" Joker drawled, fiddling with the drawstring on his pants and a curtain of green hair covering his face and expression._ _

__Batman couldn't be sure, he didn't believe in magic and yet he was friends with mages, sorcerers and even gods. He had seen fate turn to the most unlikely of men and reach out for their help. He could not imagine why any form of destiny would free Joker from the hell he so rightfully deserved. Watching this creature on the floor though, seeing him so painfully wounded and so realistically human was beginning to make Batman think that Joker may have been set loose for one simple reason._ _

__"So you could save the others," He said gently._ _

__Joker's head snapped so quickly Batman feared he would break his own neck. Chaotic green eyes sparked with something and Joker's face twisted in to that feared grin that would send children screaming for their mothers. Batman didn't flinch as Joker stood and tilted his head, watching him like a cat would a mouse._ _

__"Are you calling me a hero?" Joker rasped, "Because that's insulting."_ _

__"No, I'm calling you a messenger," Batman whispered, "Because you should have died on that table, and it was not just a coincidence that you found me, of all people, on your run to freedom."_ _

__Joker paused, it was true, in some form, that he should have been meeting death and instead found his savior instead. He giggled, covering his mouth so he didn't wake everyone as he laughed at the irony. The most feared and deadly criminal of all of Gotham had been spared, what a ridiculous notion._ _

__"You, Bats," Joker wheeled on Batman again, "Are crazy."_ _

__Joker snickered again, calling Batman crazy was like the river calling rain wet, it was so obvious but the look he was being leveled with made him believe the words._ _

__"I'm not a Hero,"_ _

__"No," Batman drawled and rested a hand on Joker's head, "But this'll do."_ _

__Batman left, and Joker found himself able to sleep much more soundly after that._ _


End file.
